Time and again, we are advised to always know our true companions and stay away from the pretentious lot. It always makes me wonder if one can really gather enough stats and find exact parameters on which to test a relationship? Even if we could, by some miracle, discover all the right norms on which to test a relationship, wouldn’t the fact that circumstances change people will always ensure that the relationship fails the assay every single time. Some catch 22, right?
The reality of the situation, however, remains that there are no agreed-upon rules or degree of those rule sets. If my definition of a good friend includes an unwavering trust, my friend’s rulebook might contain the same attribute but the degree may not be the same. Unwavering trust, for me, is a trust to the extent that even if God descends and tells me that my friend stabbed me in the back, I would not believe it. For my friend, on the other hand, it may mean that he would not give God the satisfaction of knowing that he could break our bond but would definitely confront me or keep the information (true or false) of betrayal in the back of his head. Thus, comes trouble in paradise.
My friend passed the examination of relationship and I am soaring high thinking that finally I have found the one. Suddenly, they face a situation that changes them. On the surface, they are the same person, but something has shifted inside of them. Their presence is no longer soothing, the warmth is lost, the inside jokes have lost their vigor, and — with no fault of their own — they have broken the bond. Thus, the friendship that once made me believe in angels failed the assay so bad that I have lost faith in the concept.
The intellectuals have found the perfect cure to be happy forever. They claim that if you have no expectation, you would not have to go through a broken heart. Very true. We read such words of wisdom and think to ourselves that we would stop expecting anything from anyone. This determination lasts for a few good hours — if you are lucky — and then again you shove the wisdom to the back and you start all over again. Does it mean that we should give up on relationships altogether? Absolutely not!
The world is a heaven and hell at the same time. You might face a deception from a friend and receive a note of genuine appreciation from your partner on the same day. Now, the choice lies with you: bask in the sunshine or burn in the fire. If one relationship failed your expectation, do not lose hope. Let your guardian angels pick up the pieces, wipe your tears, and create a masterpiece for you. Cry your guts out, scream, lash out, walk in the rain; do anything that removes all the toxic elements out of your system, then reset. Just because you laughed together once does not mean you would be laughing till the end. Time would change, people would evolve, and change would remain the only constant. The trick, however, is to have a belief system. Keep any philosophy that keeps you sane close to your heart. This too shall pass 🙂
This post is in response to the daily post prompt of the day: Assay.
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