Borrowed relationships and cheating spouses have been an integral part of almost every generation. Some societies frown upon these relationships more than the others. A few families take it upon themselves to punish the cheating spouses in love. I do not think that hurting anyone is ever an answer to any problem. If a person has decided to violate the sanctity of a relationship then binding them can bring no joy. Having said that it is also an undeniable fact that several people choose to overlook the signs of an affair to avoid ending a relation for the sake of kids, financial stability, and other unlimited reasons. Although I believe that love can overcome any boundary, but some boundaries are there for a reason. These are the boundaries that we vouched to respect while opening this new chapter of our lives, and we built these ourselves. Irrespective of our promises, we are tempted at many stages of the life to give in to these sensations. We forget what is at stake due to the intensity of this new attraction.
I have known a few borrowed relationships in my own surroundings, and the main reason behind these relations have been a fear of loneliness, a reluctance to give up on a failed love, and dissatisfaction in a marital relationship. I have come up with these reasons based on my own observation; however, I do not agree with most of these reasons. An acquaintance of mine, whom I cannot name due to obvious reasons, is an amazing and affluent lady, and yet, she has borrowed a spouse from another family. Her reason is that the man is a childhood friend of hers, who could not marry her due to religious differences. He had to marry another girl only to save her dying mother’s last wish — signature lie, isn’t it! She is a smart lady, and she chose to believe him. This is a man with a wife and a child but claims to be in love with my friend. The worst part is that she believes him. She showers him with her love, money, and what not, and in exchange, he says all the right things. She never got married because “he is going to divorce his wife, soon.” I doubt that soon would ever come. No matter how much logic I try to insert in her head, nothing seems to go in her head.It has been more than a decade, and nothing has changed. Some of my other acquaintances are stuck in an uneventful marriage, where their spouse is not “interesting enough,” and their quest for a change has ended them in being a cheater.
There could be a few exceptions, but for me, the consequences of these borrowed relationships are never pleasant. A little slip on our part destroys many families, including our own. We could lie, cheat, and feel good on not being caught, but this could steal the joy of love from a person’s life. The spouse being cheated may never trust anybody else. Ridding someone of their ability to love is the worst possible deed that one could do. Quitting anything is always the easiest; what’s difficult is to stay and attempt to fix it. If there is no way to resolve the issues, then, of course, there is no point in banging each other’s heads for your life. Nevertheless, being in a marital relationship and keeping an affair on the side is never an acceptable thing. Respect the person you vouched to treasure all their life and bow out of your nonfunctional marital relationship before jumping in a new venture.
P.S. This post is in response to the daily post prompt: Borrowed